Q&A

Do you have a question for ThePinkLadyJ? This is the place to look for it. I created this Q&A database when I realized I kept answering a lot of the same questions over and over again and in order to not sound like a broken record I have made this easy to use page, which is ever growing. All the questions so far are actual questions that people have already asked me.

If you have a question for me and it’s not here you may private message me on youtube “ThePinkLadyJ” or you can contact me through my email j@thepinkladyj.com (NOTE: NO BUSINESS INQUERIES. For business inquiries see contact page). Inappropriate questions will be ignored.

You can feel free to ask non-makeup related questions as long as it isn’t inappropriate or controversial (sorry I just don’t feel like talking religion or politics).


+Why do you say “Ello Gov’na” in most of your videos?
Its how I usually always answer my phone (unless I’m job interviewing then I have to knock it off for a while). I think I picked it up from My Fair Lady or Mary Poppins…or maybe it was both. Both involve characters that are Cockney English accented and just fun memorable characters. I just always adored the greeting and started using it when answering the phone roughly 7 or 8 years ago and made a habit of it. Now it’s in my videos too.
+Where do you live?
Currently residing in Texas. I won’t narrow it down further than that for personal safety reasons. I previously lived in Southern California.
+Where do you work?
Sorry revealing that information = stranger danger
+What is/was your major in college?
I have a BA in English Literature and I also have 4 AA’s in English, Liberal Arts, Business, and Business Management.
+Questions about my husband
I don’t mind answering a few questions about my husband as long as they don’t get too personal.
-Are you married?
Yes, I am married, his name is Richard/Dickie. He’s in all my J’s Travels videos and a few others.
-What does your husband think of your makeup?
He’s perfectly okay with it. He spends more money on his hobbies than I do; and he appreciates my unconventional style. I mean how can he complain? For the first three years of our relationship I helped him shave, dye, and hair-spray his big colorful Mohawk (usually pink). In fact he says my makeup makes him want to start wearing a Mohawk again so we can do crazy over-the-top stuff together. He loves me, makeup or not, and he encourages me to always be myself and express my personal style in whatever way that makes me happy. If he didn’t like me the way I am, I wouldn’t be with him (and yes, crazy over-the-top style, is a part of who I am).
-How long have you and your husband been together?
Since December of 2004.
+Why wont you stop swearing/cussing? Its not good for your younger viewers.
If any viewer is so young that my language is too offensive for their innocent ears, than they’re probably too young to be using makeup anyway! You must understand that my channel is meant for me to enjoy myself, it’s my hobby. I want to be honest and candid with my viewers, or I won’t do videos. I don’t want to be fake, or pretend to speak or act in a way that I would not in real life. I want to speak into my camera as I would speak if I were talking to a friend sitting across the table from me. There are several very important things you have to understand:

1. My channel is NOT the Disney channel. I am not children’s entertainment. NOWHERE do I claim to be children’s entertainment. I am a grown woman on my own channel, in my own home, speaking my mind, and doing a hobby I enjoy. If you want children’s entertainment try Nickelodeon.
2. It is actually against YouTube terms of service for ANYONE under the age of 13 to be on YouTube – either making videos, or having an account to watch videos. Don’t believe me? See this official YouTube video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nI2tmiKdPnU
3. I don’t have anything against kids liking makeup in principle, but makeup is generally considered a grown-up/mature activity, and that’s mostly what my channel is about. Any kid too young to hear a bad word is too young to wear makeup.
4. Your child isn’t hearing their first cuss word from me – I promise you! If your kids come to me, on my channel, they risk hearing language, because my channel is my space.
5. Grown ups have a right to say whatever they want – its called free speech – and where I come from in America it’s very important. Of course I also believe in having good manners; which is why I usually don’t directly cuss at any one person, or to any group of people, because it’d be very impolite (well at least not in my videos I’m sure I’ve called people ass holes for nearly killing me on the freeway more than a few times). If I drop the rare occasional bad word, it’s usually to describe my opinion on an object or experience. I believe it was Oliver Wendell Holmes who said: “The right to swing my fist ends where the other man’s nose begins.” I try to apply this philosophy in how I act towards others – sadly they don’t always apply it to me.
6. I don’t even cuss all that much, or all that badly, and in MOST of my videos I never cuss at all. I mean really, my language is VERY mild compared to some of the other people you can find on YouTube. Shanedawsontv and other huge YouTubers cuss tons in their videos, and talk about all kinds of mature matter that children shouldn’t hear, and they pull in way more views than me. I’m the least of your worries.
7. I was an English major in college, and I know about language and how it evolves, and where words come from; and cuss words are nothing more than words that a puritanical society long ago decided were inappropriate, and the idea has just lingered on. “Shit” is no worse than “poop.” It’s just that society has decided that some words are inappropriate, but has no good reason of explaining why “shit” should be a worse word than “poop,” except that that’s just the way it’s always been, at least as far back as Chaucer’s time. Words only have the power that we give them, and language evolves all the time. I don’t believe in such a thing as a “bad” word. Words are just verbal symbols people use to communicate ideas.
+Don’t you think you should be a better role model for your younger viewers?

ROLE MODEL? What the hell are you talking about? I’m some chick playing with fiesta colored makeup in my living room in front of a camera. How in the hell is that a role model for anybody?There are doctors and nurses out there right now saving lives. There are scientists finding cures for diseases. There are soldiers, police officers, and firemen, fighting and dying. There are Nobel Peace Prize winners. There are teachers inspiring and educating the youth for tomorrow. There are loving friends, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, sisters and brothers. There are activists laying their lives down for their beliefs. And you, or your kids, are looking to somebody LIKE ME to be a role model??? I play with makeup!!! NOBODY playing with makeup on youtube is worth being a role model. And I’m not saying there aren’t some great youtubers out there, and I’m not saying they don’t have some interesting things to say, or things to teach. But, if you’re going to model your life and get inspired by someone, you can do a WHOLE lot better than what youtube has to offer. There are better people in this world to look up to than people who mess around with their video cameras and post it online. Even “real” celebrities aren’t good enough to be role models, and people who post videos on youtube, are a major step down, even from that.I should never have to be anyone’s role model, nor would I want to be.
+How long have you been collecting makeup?
Since I was 18. I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup when I was younger than that. Though I was naughty and wore some when my mom wasn’t looking once in a while.
+Do you want to do makeup professionally?
No. This is just a hobby. My true calling in life is to write, and that is what I intend to spend my life perusing for a career. Professional cosmetology just doesn’t really interest me.
+How long does it take you to do your makeup?
Whole face + crazy eyes is 30-40 min, but i love every second of it. It’s my morning “Me” time!
+May I hire you to do my makeup?
Um…no.I enjoy makeup art, but I am in no way a professional. The only equipment I have is what I use for myself.
+What is your policy on haters, trolls & internet bullies?
When it comes to haters on my channel, or videos, the policy is 1 strike, and you’re out! Trolls, bullies, haters, or people who express extreme negativity, will have their comment promptly deleted, and they will be permanently blocked. If you have nothing nice to say, please just don’t say anything, or just don’t watch my videos. You have a right to your opinions, of course, but it doesn’t mean I, and others, have to hear it. I force no one to watch my videos, or to subscribe, so you have every freedom to leave and not watch if my content bothers you. Now as I said, extreme negativity will be blocked. Saying; “I don’t like this video,” or “I hate this,” or “I don’t like that,” isn’t extreme enough to block someone in my opinion, but if someone says; “This video fucking sucks,” than I would probably consider that to be unnecessarily rude and negative, and then I probably will block you. Also, fair warning, I know the difference between constructive criticism, and an insult, and sadly, most people who go around saying that they are just giving “constructive criticism,” don’t know that difference, and frequently over-step the line. Before you offer said criticism please ask yourself first: “If I walked up to a complete stranger on the street, and said this to their face, would they slap me?” If the answer is “yes,” than your so-called “constructive criticism” will probably not be appreciated, and I probably will end up deleting it, and maybe blocking you, depending on just how far over the line you go. Please consider that fair honest criticism, where you aren’t just trying to just “take someone down a peg,” is usually the sort of thing that is best expressed between people who are very close on a personal level. If a friend offers you a constructive criticism, you know they love you and aren’t trying to hurt you, in fact, you probably went to them for said opinion. But if a stranger criticizes you; you have no way of telling if they are being helpful or hurtful, and ask yourself honestly: “If I criticize someone I don’t really know, and who doesn’t know me, do I really want to help them out of the kindness of my heart, or am I just expressing something I don’t like for the sake of saying it?” Criticism just for the sake of saying it, is never kind, and never helpful. Also, understand that others can actually be happy the way they are. If you change every time someone says something they don’t like about you, you’d never be yourself. People should only change themselves after personal reflection, and soul searching, not because others say so.These are my thoughts and opinions on hatred and hurtfulnes,s not just on youtube and for myself, but for the whole internet, and everyone in it. I express this here so that you better understand my thoughts and feelings concerning what people express to me, and others. If I act on your opinions, be they positive or negative, it will be along this frame of mind. If I delete or block you; it is because I believe, based on my principles, that you have yet to grow as a thinking, understanding, and humane person – and perhaps I fear you never will. I act upon protecting myself, my channel, my videos, my friends, and my subscribers. Hatred is not tolerated.
+Are the photos/pictures on your channel page/blog professionally done? Who was your Photographer?
Yes, the pictures I used on my channel page were taken by a professional photographer named Willow, who is also a dear friend of mine. If you are in the LA area, and need an excellent photographer, please check out her FaceBook page for pricing or to set up an appointment. https://www.facebook.com/willow.concepts.5
+Of what nationality/heritage are you?
Well, as far as nationality goes; I’m an America. As far as heritage goes, from my mothers side I have English, German and Portuguese, and on my fathers side I’m Irish and then I have family (the namesakes of my last name actually) that have been in the United States since before the revolutionary war. Your average American mutt I guess.
+Can I give you a present/gift?
I am incredibly honored, and flattered, that you’d want to give me anything, and please don’t think that I don’t appreciate that. It really is a very sweet gesture. But, I don’t feel right taking things from people, unless I know them really well on a personal level. I’d feel awkward and obligated to return the favor, which I may not always be able to do. If you really want to do something nice for me, I ask that instead of sending presents, please just make a charitable donations to one of these organizations that could put the money to better use.
childrenofthenight.org
Children of the Night helps give wayward children adequate shelter, medical, and psychological care. These are children who run away from abusive homes, and end up on the streets, falling into prostitution, and often die young of diseases, drugs, and suicide.
diocancerfund.org
The Ronnie James Dio Stand up and Shout Cancer fund is a charity where 100% of the proceeds go to cancer awareness and education programs. Most people die from cancer because they just don’t know what watch out for. Ronnie James Dio (my all time favorite artist) passed away from stomach cancer, which could have been prevented if it had been found in its early stages. This charity was founded by his lovely wife Wendy. The best way to fight cancer is to find it early, and knowledge is the key.
aspca.org
This charity excepts donations which are used to give abandoned animals the food, shelter, and medical care they need, and most importantly, the opportunity to be adopted into a safe and loving home.
haveaheartcharity.org
In America, not all families can afford to give their children the medical care they need, even if that child suffers from cancer. This charity raises funds to help families pay for the medical treatments of a child suffering from cancer.
A gift to any one of these charities will warm my heart and make me far happier than any lipstick or eyeshadow gift ever could.
+Can we meet/hang out some time?
I do have a policy about not meeting up with people that I don’t know from the internet. It’s nothing personal, I apply this to everyone. Usually if I want to meet someone in person, who I met from the internet, I need to spend a lot of time getting to know them first on a personal level.
+What is your policy on getting free products for reviews?
See my Business page
+Is J your real name?
J is my nickname. The internet can be a dangerous place sometimes, so for my own safety I keep my real full name to myself.
+Are you vegan or vegetarian?
Nope.
+Do you use vegan or cruelty free products?
I’m not a vegan, so I don’t exclusively use vegan products, but I do prefer to choose things that are cruelty free whenever possible. But, to be honest, I don’t always have that kind of information at my fingertips when I’m making a purchase, and so I often buy things and find out later that they were subject to animal testing. Once that’s happened, I’m not going to throw my product out – what’s done, is done. Sometimes I know a company does do animal testing, but will buy a product anyway if it’s something exclusive or unique to that company, and I know I can’t get something equal or better in quality or color elsewhere. That doesn’t happen too often but sometimes it does happen, and I make no claims to being perfect. So generally speaking – I prefer to be cruelty free with my products – but it doesn’t always happen. I’m not inclined to go all to pieces if I make a mistake when it comes to this matter. I just do my best, whenever I can. It takes quite a lot of research and conscious effort to maintain a vegan/cruelty-free lifestyle, and it’s quite an uphill battle considering that animal testing is not exclusive to cosmetics. It’s also prevalent in hygiene, medicine, and many other facets of our life that we may not even suspect. It’s a shame that things are this way, but I am always grateful to see that more and more cosmetic companies are making a good effort to avoid animal testing.One day for curiosity’s sake I made a scale for myself, and my friends, to see “How Vegan or Cruelty-Free are you” on this scale I’d say I’m about 65-75% Cruelty Free.


How Vegan/Cruelty Free are you?
100% Vegan/Cruelty-Free. I don’t buy anything unless I’ve done my research, and know for an absolute fact that my products are vegan and/or cruelty free. If someone gives me a product that isn’t V/CF, I will not even touch it.
90% V/CF. I don’t buy anything unless I’ve done my research, and know for an absolute fact that my products are V/CF – BUT, if someone gives me a product that isn’t V/CF, I might keep, or use it, just so I don’t hurt that person’s feelings. But I would never use “my own” money to support companies that are not V/CF.
80% V/CF. I try to avoid using products that aren’t V/CF whenever possible. But, sometimes I don’t know if a product is or isn’t V/CF, and buy it anyway. If I find out later that it is not V/CF, then I know to never buy from that company again.
70% V/CF. I try to avoiding products that aren’t V/CF whenever possible. But, sometimes I don’t know if a product is or isn’t V/CF, and buy it anyway. If I find out later that a product is not V/CF and I cannot find a product of similar or equal quality, color, or price from a company that is V/CF, than admittedly I might buy from that company again – but if I can find a V/CF dupe, I’d gladly make the switch.
60% V/CF. I like when I see companies that try to be V/CF, and I’d prefer to give them my money, more than some other company that isn’t V/CF. But, admittedly, I do give my money to companies that aren’t always V/CF, if I like their stuff well enough. I like the “idea” of V/CF, but it’s not something I feel passionately enough about to make radical changes to my shopping behavior. I generally mean well, but my purchases don’t always reflect my principles.
50% V/CF. I am indifferent about whether or not my products are V/CF.
40% V/CF: I often buy products that are not cruelty free, because I feel what’s done is done.
30% V/CF: I wouldn’t hurt an animal myself, but if companies want to test their products on animals I’m okay with it, because it’s for my safety, and it’s not like I’m the one having to perform the tests. My concept of animal testing is: “out of sight, out of mind” or “for the greater good.”
20% V/CF: I hate V/CF products, because I don’t trust something that hasn’t been thoroughly tested on an animal first, or I believe V/CF products are lacking in quality.
10% V/CF: I refuse to buy something that has not thoroughly gone through animal testing. My comfort, safety and convenience, are worth far more to me than some animal’s life, or if it suffers.
0% V/CF: I bite heads off chickens, and wear their blood as war paint.
+A Million & 1 Hair questions
I get tons of questions about my hair, it seems to be a never-ending mystery to most of the world. I don’t know why, it’s just long hair, there isn’t that much to it – except how much length there is. But, these are all questions I get a lot, from both online, and offline.
-How long did it take you to grow your hair?
I’ve had long hair my whole life. I have never had a significant hair cut. I was born with almost an inch of thick fuzzy brown hair all over my head. Mom & Dad never gave me a significant hair cut while it was growing out. By age 2, it was bra strap length (I wasn’t wearing a bra, that’s the length it’s called on adults but you get what i mean), by 3, it was at my waist, and by kindergarten it was down to my lower back. Through middle school, and high school, it was tailbone length, and after 18 it was down to my thighs. I trim 2” every 6 months to remove split ends and keep it healthy.
-Is it hard to take care of or live with?
Nope quite easy, see my video on how I take care of it
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tu7u37BlTdU
-Will you grow your hair longer?
I would if I could, but it seems to have reached its terminal length. Some people can grow hair to the floor, and beyond, but other people can’t grow their hair past a certain point, and that is determined by their genetics. Both my mother and father had/have long hair, and they both had/have a terminal length.
-Would you ever cut your hair for locks of love, or any other hair charities?
No. Locks of Love is a horrible scam. If you want to donate your hair, just don’t give it to them. Read these articles to see why.
http://verybigblog.com/2006/04/24/locks-of-love-is-a-scam/
http://badhairday.typepad.com/bad_hair_day/2006/07/locks_of_love_i.html
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/06/fashion/06locks.html?_r=4&pagewanted=1&adxnnlx=1189688589-tkg5awRMcBm627D1VsotpQ
http://hannah.tedpearson.com/?p=322
http://msgboard.snopes.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=21;t=001082;p=0
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/34753/locks_of_love.html
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2080445/what_you_should_know_before_donating.html?cat=48
http://www.ripoffreport.com/nonprofit-organizations/locks-of-love/locks-of-love-ripoff-dishones-dfx75.htm
http://www.paganspace.net/forum/topics/the-hairy-truth-about-locks-of
And on and on and on – a million articles about why NOT to give to that organization. I frankly think giving money to children’s hospitals or charities, so families can afford to pay for their children’s treatments, does a far greater good than a bit of hair ever could. Donate blood, donate time, donate money if you really want to help those less fortunate.
-Why don’t you want to cut your hair?
I’ve had it my whole life – and I don’t want to cut it because
1. I happen to love it the way it is, and always have and always will.
2. Everybody else loves it – my friends, my family (with the exception of 1 family member), my husband, and even random strangers – of course the opinion that matters the most is my own, because it’s my hair, and my head, and I’m the one living with it.
3. It’s very easy to take care of.
4. It’s super inexpensive to take care of. I don’t use expensive hair tools. I don’t pay for salons. or stylists. or expensive products. Just shampoo and conditioner. and inexpensive shampoo and conditioner at that.
5. More people compliment my hair in one day. than most short-haired women get in a lifetime (and that’s not even counting online compliments).
6. You can do a lot with long hair styling-wise (lol well I “can” but I usually don’t. because I’m lazy).
7. Hundreds (maybe thousands of people by now) have come up to me and said “promise me you wont cut your hair.” so I guess I got a lot of promises to keep – so I will.
-Why do you have such long hair?
This isn’t quite the same question as “why won’t you cut it.” The answer is simple – I like it. Why wear bright eyeshadow? Why listen to Heavy Metal? Why do you like fantasy? Why is pink your favorite color? Why do anything that I do? Because I like it – not a lot of mystery to it – I just know what I like.
-Will you do another hair brushing video – slower/sexier/naked?
NO! My channel is not here to support the hair fetish demographic. If you want to watch my videos (for whatever weird reason) fine, but I’m not catering specifically to fetishers.
-What brand hair brush do you use, and where can I get one?
Mine is a “Goody” brand brush. I’ve had it a loooooooong time, maybe since before Jr. High (wow damn I guess its a very durable brush it never looses bristles). I think I got it at a Target, or K-mart, but seeing as it’s been with me so long, I can’t be sure. I went to their site www.goody.com and they still sell brushes, but I didn’t see mine specifically. Mine is a bristle brush, it’s better for volumizing straight or thin hair. Any bristle such as a boar bristle should be of equal effect.
-What hair products do you use?
Inexpensive shampoo and conditioner. I used to use Suave, White Rain or Vo5, but these days I’ve been enjoying Organix. And a regular bristle brush. Yep that’s all!
-How often do you brush your hair? Do you brush 100 strokes a day?
I give it one quick brushing in the morning before I wash it (washing tangled hair = disaster). I give it one thorough brushing after it dries, and then sometime during the day I’ll give it one more quick brushing, in case it gets untidy. That’s about it. As for 100 strokes a day, hell if I know. I don’t count; that’d be way too tedious for me. I like to think about other things while doing my hair, I’m not that focused on it.
-Why wont you do a tutorial about your hair?
Because there is NOTHING to do a tutorial about. I wash it, I brush it. That’s it! You don’t need a tutorial showing you how to do that. NO, I will not wash it for you to see. That’s unnecessary. And as for brushing, I already made a video showing my morning hair brushing routine:

And no, I will not make MORE videos showing me brushing my hair because ONE is enough!
I have done one hair style tutorial because that’s about ALL I can do. I don’t do much with my hair style-wise (I get more compliments just leaving it down and natural anyway), so there isn’t much I know how to do:

-Will you (or why won’t you) do more hair videos? Brushing, flipping, washing, dunking, trimming, etc…
Alright you guys lets get one thing straight right here and NOW! My channel does not exist to support the hair fetisher demographic – PERIOD! If you guys want to watch my videos, FINE. I don’t mind. If you want to enjoy them for whatever pleasures they offer you – FINE! If you want to subscribe in hopes of me posting more hair-related videos – FINE! But, please understand I am NOT going to cater to your fetishes. That is NOT the point of my channel. I am NOT here to provide sexual thrills for men. If I show my hair at all it is to provide actual information; about myself, grooming tips, or other such USEFUL information involving hair care or style. I am not going to show myself, washing, dunking, trimming, flipping, twisting, playing, or doing other such stupid things with my hair just to get your jollys off! Sorry wrong channel!!! You can enjoy my videos that are there for what they are, but I will not take requests that I deem of a sexual nature. And no, I will not make more videos showing me brushing my hair. I have made one (to depict how long my morning hair routine is), and ONE is enough. Do not ask me for more.
-How long is your hair?
As of 8/4/10 it was 37” but then as soon as I was done measuring it I had my Bi-annual 2” trim and busted myself down to 35”.The measurement was taken with a tape-measure starting at where my hair parts at the top and spanning to the very ends. If this isn’t how you measure your hair, or how “experts” measure their hair – oh well! I only measured to answer this question, which people kept asking, and I did it to the best of my ability. I’m not trying to get any world records, and I don’t want the world’s longest hair. If you won’t consider my measurement accurate enough, then at least consider it a good estimate. The measurement I took on 8/4/10 was actually the first time in my life I have ever even bothered to measure my hair, because before people started asking, I never even cared.
-What hair dye do you use?
3 or 4 times a year (or whenever I feel like it) I’ll dye just the front parts of my hair pink using Manic Panic Hot Hot Pink. I like it because it’s not that harsh of a dye, it’ll show up over my hairs natural color, AND I know for a fact it will 100% wash out after time.
-Why wont you dye all of your hair?
Because it would take 10 jars of dye, 4 extra pairs of hands, and a professional clean up crew. Just doing the front parts is already way more effort than I like, so I don’t get in the mood to do it too often.
-Why don’t you dye your hair “insert color here”?
I like my natural color just fine. I use Pink if I want to play with something unnatural. Any other unnatural colors won’t show up in my hair unless I bleach it, and bleach is permanent, so that is not an option.
-Why wont you cut layers into it?
Layers are a fad, and I don’t happen to like the way they look. I don’t think my hair would look better with layers. I get a lot of people literally angry with me because I wont conform to modern hair trends and do what all the fashion magazines say is popular. They tell me my hair is boring. What’s boring to me is having the same hair everyone else has, because it’s “in style.” Someone with hair over three feet long, isn’t something you see every day, so it’s far from boring as far as I’m concerned. If you want layers – get them for your hair. I like mine the way it is, and I’m the one who has to live with my hair, and I’d rather do my own thing and be happy than do what everyone else is doing.
-Why don’t you want bangs?
I had them up until I was in the 2nd grade, and I fricken hated them. I hated how they constantly needed to be trimmed, and how unless I fussed with styling them, they hung there like a limp curtain – no thanks. Been there. Done that. I asked my mom to let them grow, and I’ve never looked back since.
-Is your hair heavy?
Generally, no. Most of the time I don’t even notice it. The only time my hair ever feels heavy, is if it’s wet, or if I were to change the part in my hair – when the weight isn’t evenly distributed it can feel too heavy on one side.
-Does your hair cause you to have headaches?
Nope.
-Why don’t you part your hair differently?
I like my hair parted in the middle. I know a lot of people have a hard time accepting that. You’d be AMAZED how many people don’t want to accept that, but it is quite true – I like my hair parted in the middle. I tried parting it more to one side when I was younger, and I didn’t like it. I didn’t like the way it looked, or the way it felt. Believe it or not, parting my hair in any other way than the natural part down the middle is quite painful. Your hair grows in certain natural directions on your head, and for me forcing my hair to part in ways that it wouldn’t naturally part, causes the follicles on my scalp to hurt. Not to mention my hair – when parted down the middle – doesn’t feel heavy to me. I’m quite comfortable with it. But if I force the majority of my hair onto one side of my head, then yes, I can feel it being heavy, and it is a little on the uncomfortable side – probably because the weight isn’t being evenly distributed.
-Does your hair feel too hot in the summer?
Nope, and I’ve lived in Southern California my whole life. I do notice that I feel colder if its winter and I wear my hair up in a bun though. I’m more used to warmth than cold but that just comes with being a Californian I think.
-Do you hate short hair?
I’d hate it if it were on me. I don’t have the face for it, and I love my long hair. But contrary to what a lot of people think I don’t hate short hair, or different hair types, or hair styles, on other people. I have friends with hair of all lengths, colors, and types, and on them I really like their looks. Just because I wouldn’t wear something for myself doesn’t mean I dislike it in general. Everyone has to do what works best for them, or what makes them happy, and if you like straightened hair, permed hair, layered, asymmetrical cut, fairy tale ends, blunt cuts, bangs, no bangs, long, short, and everything in between, then by all means rock that shit!
-Why didn’t your parents cut your hair when you were growing up?
Well, my mom desperately wanted long hair ever since she was a little girl, but grandma kept whacking it all off, so finally mom won out in high school and grew her hair long – and she loved it – but then after high school she cut her hair into a bob and positively hated it, and really missed her long hair. Eventually she grew it back. It was lower back length for the rest of her days (she’s since passed on). But when she had me, she didn’t want to do to me what grandma did to her, so she let my hair grow (with the exception of cutting bangs for me – which I hated).

My dad had similar parental issues. Grandpa was a military man, and all his boys had to have crew cuts, and my dad grew up when the Beatles were getting big and he so desperately wanted a “mop top,” but grandpa wouldn’t have it. Finally around high school grandpa loosened up and let dad grow a bit of hair. Not too much, maybe a few inches, but that’s a lot compared to a military crew cut. He was really enjoying it up until he joined the navy. Bzzzt there goes all the hair! As soon as he got out of the Navy he started growing it long. He has waist length hair now. He wishes he could get it longer, but it’s at a terminal length, and he loves it. I think it’s cool that he has long hair, and does his own thing (I think my dad looks like a medieval wizard – and that’s awesome by the way LOL). Naturally, when I came along, my dad was all for letting my hair grow. He’s always been of the opinion that women look better with some hair (which is probably why he liked mom so much).

I guess I’m very lucky that I had two parents that supported me growing my hair and I’m very thankful to the both of them for that.
-Will you curl your hair?
Nope. Curling my hair would require 1 of 3 possible methods.

Dry curling: where you put your hair in curlers after washing it and when they dry, they hold a curl. But, dry curling doesn’t work on me for more than an hour or two because my hair is so long, and so heavy, the very weight of my hair flattens the curls out. Not to mention, I wash my hair in the morning, and dry curling is something you have to do at night. I couldn’t sleep comfortably with curlers in my hair. I live with my husband and I don’t think he’d find “curler head’ very attractive either lol.

A Curling iron: Any product that uses heat – at all – is completely out of the question. Nothing damages hair worse than heat. I know they sell products to help protect your hair from heat, but the heat can still do damage, even through the best of products, and I don’t feel like damaging my hair permanently for a temporary look – no thanks.

A Perm: Believe it or not; when I was in the 5th grade my mom took me to a salon where they gave me a spiral perm. The stylist found it quite cumbersome trying to perm hair that was as long as mine, and warned my mom for hair my length it might take a lot of work to take care of it after the perm – and she wasn’t kidding. I positively HATED that perm. I had actually wanted curly hair before I got it, because I have always believed curly hair to be exceptionally beautiful (I still believe this actually), but it just wasn’t meant for me. I like hair I can just brush quick and go, and curly hair takes a lot more time, and completely different brushing and combing methods than what I’m used to. My best friend has hip length, super thick, and super curly hair, and I don’t know how she manages it and keeps it so beautiful, but for me curly hair was the worst thing I had ever done to myself. I have no desire to repeat the experience.
-Do you flat iron your hair?
Nope. It’s naturally straight this way. I have had some people tell me I should flat iron it anyway – – – why? I mean really, I don’t get why I would want hair flatter than it already is. I think girls these days are really enslaved by the flat iron, and I blame modern trends and fashion magazines. Apparently if you don’t have hair as thin and straight as a sheet of paper you’ve sinned against fashion – fashion can take a hike.
-You should cut your hair just to thin it out because it’s too thick.
I know that’s a statement and not a question, but I get it enough to where I think it needs to be addressed. I LOVE how thick my hair is. I don’t see why in the world I would ever want thin scraggly hair. Long hair also tends to look much better if it’s kind of thick. Super long hair, that is as thin as a pencil when put into a braid or pony tail, just isn’t my thing. When I see thick hair, I think healthy. Thin hair doesn’t necessarily mean unhealthy, some people just have hair that is of a very fine texture, and even though it’s not very thick their hair is always the softest of the soft. My hair is of a medium texture, and so it naturally tends to be a bit thicker – that’s just the way nature made it and I don’t see the point in trying to change that – especially when it would look bad for my hair type. I think the people who tell me my hair is too thick are also the same people obsessed with having the flattest flat ironed hair possible. That’s kind of sad, because I think if people have naturally thick, wavy, or curly hair, they should embrace it and wear it the way it is. Thick, wavy and curly hair is very beautiful, and I think it’s kind of sad that modern fashion tells girls they should hide or destroy it all with a flat iron. I can’t wait for the flat iron fad to go away.
-Can I touch it?
No creeper. Seriously I’ve had strangers touch my hair before, and it is NOT cool. That is a major violation of someone’s personal space. I don’t mind if friends, family, and loved ones touch it, because I’m comfortable with them – but strangers – absolutely not.
-Do you use coconut oil?
I’ve tried it a couple times but it didn’t seem to do anything for my hair – and I hate hate hate the way oil (good or bad) feels in my hair. Yuck.
-How often do you wash your hair?
Every day. I have a super super oily scalp. And yes, I have tried washing it less, because supposedly over-washing can cause more oil production – it didn’t work. I tried washing it every other day, every two days for weeks on end to see if it would change or get better – it didn’t. Some people, believe it or not, really can produce just that much oil. I also tried using oil in my hair (like coconut oil) because I heard that helps – it didn’t. My hair just has to be washed every day, that’s all there is to it. To combat all the washing I just make sure to let the conditioner soak in for the duration of my whole shower, and my hair doesn’t really feel or sound dry at all.
-How much shampoo and conditioner do you use?
If you mean – in one washing – then I use a palm-full of shampoo and a palm-full of conditioner.

If you mean – how long does it take me to go through a bottle of shampoo or conditioner – I go through about a whole bottle of both in a month’s time – which isn’t much of a hardship because I use very inexpensive shampoos and conditioners.
-Does your hair take a long time to wash?
Nope. I shower every morning no matter what, so while I’m in there I just whip in a little shampoo and conditioner at the start of my shower, and rinse it all out at the end. Probably takes me no more than 3-4 minutes tops. Most of my shower time doesn’t even involve my hair.
-How long does it take for your hair to dry?
If you saw my hair care video you know I air dry because blow dryers are damaging. My hair takes about 1-2 hours to dry, depending on the weather. I happen to live in a very warm and dry climate, so I think that helps a lot because I’ve had people who live in cooler, or more humid climates, tell me it takes their hair 6-8 hours to air dry. Another thing that might help, is that I wear my hair up in a towel for 5-10 minutes, and that absorbs a lot of the excess water. Then when I take the towel down I rub my hair all over with the towel between my hands to help get even more excess moisture off, and that also helps separate the strands. Hair that gets into the “wet hair dreadlocks” takes longer to dry because when the strands are all bunched together the air can’t reach the individual hair strands as easily.
-What’s your hair washing routine like?
I wake up and the fist thing I do is brush my hair (1-2 minutes) with a soft bristle brush. I don’t use combs. This removes any knots I might have acquired in the middle of the night (I don’t have much of an issue with knots), then I jump straight in the shower. The first thing I do in the shower is work in some shampoo but just from the neck up, because that’s where all the oil production is. Then I let the shampoo run down the length of my hair. Then I ring out the length and put conditioner into the length of my hair – only from the shoulders down because with my oily scalp I don’t need conditioner anywhere but the length. Then I proceed with the rest of my shower while the conditioner and shampoo have time to soak into my hair. After I’m done with all the rest of my shower routine I just rinse out the shampoo and conditioner. Of my whole 10-15 minute shower, only 3-4 minutes of it actually involves doing anything with my hair. I take long showers because they’re relaxing mostly so I hate to rush. I thoroughly wring out my hair, then I get out of the shower and I wrap my hair up in a towel (turban style) for about 5-10 minutes while I do my skin care routine and get dressed. The towel absorbs the majority of the excess moisture. When I take off the towel I rub my hair all over with the towel to separate all the strands and pick up any other excess moisture. Then my hair just air dries while I do the rest of my morning routine: eat, coffee, email, makeup, get my stuff ready for the day etc. The very very last thing I do before I walk out the door is brush my hair (2-3 minutes), that way my hair will have had the most air dry time possible. If it’s still a little on the damp side (in the colder months of winter it may take a little longer than normal to dry), then I just do a very light gentle top layer brushing and wait until I get to my destination to give it a more deep and thorough brushing. A soft bristle brush is VERY gentle on the hair so I can brush rather quickly without doing damage. So, all in all, my hair takes about 7-10 minutes out of my entire morning including brushing, washing and drying. Most people with shorter hair take waaaaay longer on their hair in a day, and most people don’t even wash it every day like I do. So you see long hair really isn’t hard to take care of, and is quite quick and easy to take care of if you know how. If I wanted to put my hair in a braid maybe add 5 minutes to that estimate, if a bun add 15 (I’m slow at buns). Mostly I just leave my hair down. It doesn’t bother me to have it down. I might give it one or two mid-day brushings to keep it tidy, and at night I throw it over the back of my pillow where it does a good job of staying out of my way and manages to have an easy time of avoiding knots – I know this seems like a lot of explaining for doing so little but for some reason people have a hard time believing how easy and quick it really is.
-Aren’t you supposed to cut your hair every 6-12 weeks?
The reason most people have to trim their hair every 6-12 weeks is because most people these days use things like blow dryers, flat irons, curling irons, or they brush or comb their hair while wet (very damaging), or use harsh dyes, bleach, and take regular trips to salons where stylists torture their client’s hair with harsh chemicals. If you don’t do any of that stuff – then you don’t have to trim more than 2 or 3 times a year. And the people who say 6-12 weeks, are usually the people working in the salons. Of course they’ll tell you to come back every 6-12 weeks because 1. That’s more money, more often, for them and 2. They’re the one’s probably causing most of the damage that’s being done to your hair.

I never use ANY heat tools on my hair, no bleach, no chemicals, no products other than shampoo and conditioner, I never brush or comb it when wet, and I always let it air dry. I occasionally will use a mild dye to color just the very front of my hair pink, but that’s about it. Because I don’t punish my hair, my hair stays quite healthy, and I only really start needing a trim after about 6 or 7 months. When that time comes I only trim 2” which removes any split or dry ends and helps the hair look more full and even and healthy.
-How do you use the toilet with hair that long?
This question is pretty much always of a facetious nature. I mean seriously – You can’t figure out that you just MOVE IT? Surely you can figure that much out? If the concept of moving something out of the way is really too much for you to grasp; you must have an awful lot of shit in your pants.